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"How are you?" The truth is not always welcome here.
For many people, asking, "How are you?" is mere punctuation to aid the flow of conversation. There are certain phrases that are like warm up shots in a game of tennis. They are not the real thing.
For these types, it is best to omit the truth. However, you can tell a truth without compromise. Instead of saying, "I'm fine" (which for me means, "I'm about as low as I can get!") or the even worse, "Not too bad" (very English), I say the honest, "I'm doing good, thank you!" This wonderfully ambiguous phrase is my truth. Every day, even the worst days, I still seek to do a little bit of good for some other soul. (Yes, I'm a righteous dude, I know!!!) Of course, the listener reads this as I'm OK, but that's OK, isn't it?
For others, they need you to play a role. Some are not ready for the truth. They need you to be amazing or at least OK. A good example is children. So the, "I'm doing good, thank you!" answer works well for them too, but needs a little extra magic. This is where I think we need to emit the 'truth'. Emit means to discharge something, especially radiation. My children and my grandchildren, and my listeners to my radio shows, need me to emit positivity, hope, sparkle. While this hasn't always been my practice and sometimes seems impossible, it is always my intention. Like a cheetah running, I can usually manage short bursts before needing to recharge!
And then there are the rare few who welcome the truth. When I ask you, "How are you?" I want the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I want you to put your hand on a metaphorical bible and in the court of love, tell me how you really are. Why? Because I am genuinely interested in your well-being.
And by "I" I mean "Moodscope" - we are genuinely interested in your well-being. That's what our blog support structure is for - to help you deal with your truth.
In this small, safe environment, it is safe to admit the truth - it's welcome here because you are welcome here.
So, how are you today?
A Moodscope member.
Thoughts on the above? Please feel free to post a comment on our blog on the Moodscope web site: