Saturday, 28 June 2014

Stuck.

I've recently been particularly low with my constant companion anxiety gnawing away at me during the day and frequently in the early hours too. However as the good weather has arrived and I've dragged myself from beneath the cosy duvet of a morning, my recently created Happiness tracks have nurtured and challenged me in equal measure.

'Stuck in a Moment' that amazing track by U2 which I'm sure has been referred to here before, has really begun to mean something deeper than some thoughtful words put to an amazing tune. It's become a deeply personal track and feels as if Bono was reading my mind! I must have heard it hundreds of times but it's only today it's finally clicked.

Last  time I listened to it I sobbed for the entire length of the track and felt utterly bereft. But today something different happened, I realised I was no longer stuck. The constant rumination that plagues me over and over again, not being able to get past certain events, watching the film on repeat in my head, was gone. My inner voice, my critical me has taken a holiday for which I'm very glad. The 'if only, why didn't you, you should'...ticker tapes have stopped and I can think more clearly and feel a weight lifting.

Despite the intensity and the sadness of the track, I love the crescendo and the uplifting words at the end.
 
On the darkest days remember it is just a moment, it will pass. It may not be today, tomorrow or anytime soon but one day you'll realise you're no longer stuck.

Eleanor
A Moodscope member.