Monday, 23 December 2013

Playing The Proud Card.

Here's the fifteenth in the series of excellent blogs by Lex covering the adjectives on the 20 Moodscope cards. Please don't forget we'd love you to add any ideas, tips, insights or advice you may have that you'd like to share with other Moodscope members that might be of help. Many thanks. Caroline.

In the fifteenth of my series on the twenty Moodscope cards, it's the turn of the "Proud" card – a red card – a positive card. Moodscope defines this as: "feeling sense of achievement".

Well that's just as well that there is a definition because "Proud" is a word that is not OK with me. I'm British and we know that, "Pride comes before a fall." We lost an Empire, arguably through pride and arrogance. The people I dislike most are proud and arrogant. But this is meant to be a good word. "A sense of achievement" – works for me much better.  The Brits have added a few good things to history of which we should be proud!

In the battle of day-to-day management of my fragile mindset, little victories count for much. This mirrors the fact that tiny setbacks can 'destroy' me. This is why I count my victories...and in the spirit of this card, I am proud of them. When the war seems to be being won by the floodtide of darkness, little victories really matter.

What kind of victories are important to me? Well, when I'm low, I'm a potty-mouth! I'm amazed at just how eloquent I can be when fed up. Bang my leg into the door...it's the door's fault! And I give it some 'feedback'. I know it's nonsense. I know it's stupid. I know the door is an inanimate object. And I know that banging into the door was my fault.  But when I'm low, I don't want to know this. I just want to vent my anger on anything that 'makes' the day worse.

Thus, every time I hold my tongue and say to myself, "that's just an inanimate object" – I'm proud of that tiny victory over my own stupidity! What are your small victories that help win the war against depression? Do tell!

Lex
A Moodscope User.

9 comments:

  1. ....Reminding myself that my 'antagonist' might just have had 'words ' with their partner, and still be seething,,,( actually I think this could even be a 'Medium ' -sized victory ! )

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  2. Having a very very small number of friends who like me however low I feel and possibly come across.... and reading your blogs Lex.The third paragraph of your post made me laugh.

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  3. My small victories on usual days are completing tasks I had been putting off (that usually means my mood is turning for the better), not forgetting to do moodscope, forcing myself for a walk, switching the computer off earlier to have a quiet evening, being able to solve a homework for school, remebering to contact a friend I haven't seen for a long time ... and so on, the list may be endless. Of course on really bad days even getting dressed or being able to pay attention at school is a great victory.

    It also helps to reming myself of my past victories, the bigger ones (and answering the card helps it). My big succes is graduating (and all the tasks I had to complete to even get that far), my recent medium sized succes is organising a meeting of my former schoomates, a great succes is learning all the tricks I know about myself to battle depression in the past few years. Again, going further to the past, the list is endless ..

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  4. I uaually think of my achievements as a Mum when this card comes up. Whatever difficulties I have faced and however my mental health has affected me I have brought up 3 wonderful people who are now young adults. They are far more resiliant and aware than I was at their age and I am proud that patterns are not repeating.

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    1. My sentiments exactly and why I score high on this card. Like Lex,I don't like the word Proud but I am proud I guess of my two children and how they have turned out despite me.

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  5. absolutely, yes - anger management - lost count of the number of things broken, damaged, through unreasoning mist of rage - and, strangely, how proud I am of keeping calm, tackling issues as they arise - always inanimate objects suffer luckily, a transfer of my anger at the world, myself, my lack of "achievement", the violence and shouting brings a temporary relief, then embarrassment, sadness at what I've broken, etc. So the proud card, used in this way to benchmark steady progress in achieving goals - absolutely.

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  6. I put "extremely" every time as I think of my daughters and grandchildren. They accept me as I am wherever, whatever and whenever. The rough with the smooth. Hard hard times and good times. Even the British can be proud of their achievements, whatever they are, so maybe let yourself have an "extremely" from time to time.

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  7. I do feel proud of my children but that was a very hit and miss effort which turned out well, fortunately for them and me. What really helped me with this card was when the definition "feeling sense of achievement" was put next to it. I usually base this on my quilting efforts and score high, I find it very hard to evaluate anything else in my life.

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    1. I like the way you say that it was a very hit and miss effort with your children which turned out well. This is exactly how I felt and feel about mine.

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