Wednesday, 14 August 2013

Doing the right (unpopular) thing.


Don't you just hate it when you upset someone else?

It's impossible to go through life causing offence to nobody, but I guess a number of us try to do just that. Then, when we do inadvertently hurt other people's feelings what do we do? And how do we feel?

Well, there seem to be two kinds of people in this life. There's the "well, if they can't deal with it then it's just their problem" category and the other type, who obsess and worry about how to fix things so everyone is happy. That would be me then. Oh, you too, eh?

And it can't be done. Sometimes we have to take a stand. We have to do what we feel or know to be right, even if that stand means that other people don't get what they want; even if they hurt us right back by accusations of unfairness, cruelty, not understanding them and so on.

Sometimes we are in the wrong. We can acknowledge that we have perhaps been insensitive in the way we've dealt with things. Maybe we have been tactless with the words we've used. Maybe we have not taken their natural feelings into account.

We can apologise, we can try to understand why the other person is hurt, but in the end, we have to do what we feel to be right. Long term, compromising our own beliefs is a canker that will cause us more suffering than standing fast to what we know to be good and truthful and right.

Thinking about the Moodscope cards, we're going to score that "guilty" card in both cases, but one is a reflection of strength (go on, score "strong" with a 3 then) and one a weakness, that we've let ourselves down. It's a tough choice, and if you're like me you'll hate having to make it, but the Moodscope maths make sense. So (deep breath) "I'm sorry you feel like that, but I have to do what I feel is right." Hmmm: I think I'll go practise saying that a few times before actually trying it out.

Mary
A Moodscope User.